Trump’s Days Keep Getting Worse As Report Claims Michael Cohen Cooperated With “Multiple Government Agencies” That Are Investigating Trump Family

Oof. Just when Donnie thought things couldn't get any worse.


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636 points

Donald Trump has had himself a rough few weeks, folks. His supporters made complete and utter asses of themselves, and him, when they stormed the Capitol like a bunch of generic brand insurgents, disrespecting and defaming one of this nation’s most sacred buildings, as Congress was trying to do their duty to count and certify the Electoral College votes — all because they’re whiney little crybabies who didn’t get their way and listened far too close to their Dear Leaders firing orders — a move I can only imagine they’ll live to regret for the rest of their lives.

Trump has spent literal months egging his base to do just exactly this through baseless conspiracy theories and calls to participate in the very protest that resulted in a massive, violent riot, and it’s all coming back to bite him in the ass real quick-like. I mean, for Pete’s sake, the dude lost his beloved Twitter account. That’s pretty much the worst thing that could ever happen to him, right?

But wait, it gets better — for us, at least.

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On the heels of this whole monstrous mess, Donald Trump’s former personal attorney and “fixer” Michael Cohen recently took to his Twitter account (that he’s still allowed to use, mind ya) to reveal that he is providing his testimony to “multiple government agencies” that are investigating Donald Trump and his family as the protections of the presidency he has enjoyed these past 4 years comes to a close.

“I have been asked and have agreed to cooperate with multiple government agencies to provide testimony on the wrongdoing by Trump and the Trump Family,” Cohen said in his tweet. “I am doing this in large part as Trump and family have tried, and thankfully failed, to destroy America’s democracy.”

Cohen went on to share his thoughts on his former boss’s lifetime ban from his favorite social media platform.

“Know that Trump relies on Twitter to exist in the same way we require oxygen to breathe. He is losing his marbles right now!” he wrote.

Pack your bags, Donnie boy, and get used to the color orange. Because it is over with a capital O.

Featured image via Flickr/Gage Skidmore, under Creative Commons license 2.0


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