Governor Gavin Newsom has decided that if Donald Trump can hand out funny nicknames, then so can he. And he isn’t holding back.
In recent weeks, Newsom has been rolling out one nickname after another, targeting Trump’s closest allies with short and stinging labels.
The list is growing fast. And it is already brutal.
1. “Karolyin’ Leavitt”
The first one is for White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt. Newsom calls her “Karolyin’ Leavitt.” It is a play on the word “cryin’,” and he even posted a Hunger Games meme to go along with it. He clearly wants people to see her as someone who is always whining.
KAROLYIN’ LEAVITT says Happy Labor Day! pic.twitter.com/ynwRvRbfSG
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) September 1, 2025
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2. “Just Dance Vance”
Next up is Senator J.D. Vance. Newsom has decided to call him “Just Dance Vance.” He says Vance is only popular because Trump picked him “out of the bargain bin at Walmart.” According to Newsom, Vance is like someone dancing around on Fox News just to get Trump’s approval.
J.D. “JUST DANCE” VANCE, WHO NOBODY LIKED UNTIL TRUMP PICKED HIM OUT OF THE “BARGAIN BIN” IN THE WALMART CLEARANCE SECTION, WENT ON FOX TO TRASH ME, GAVIN C. NEWSOM, AMERICA’S MOST POPULAR GOVERNOR. THE DANCING QUEEN CAN’T STOP! I LIVE RENT-FREE IN HIS HEAD (VERY TINY SPACE,…
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 29, 2025
3. “Kowgirl Kristi” (and more)
Then we have South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem. Instead of sticking to one name, Newsom switches it up. Sometimes it’s “Kowgirl Kristi,” other times it’s “Kristi the Sailor” or “Kristi the Painter.” The point is the same every time — he wants to show that she is playing dress-up and doesn’t take herself seriously.
NEW CHARACTER ALERT: The Kosplay Kristi universe just expanded!!
Meet Kowgirl Kristi — riding into America’s nightmares near you. pic.twitter.com/dX0eppbT2X
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 25, 2025
NEW CHARACTER ALERT: The Kosplay Kristi universe just expanded!! Kristi the Sailor — sinking America’s respect around the world. pic.twitter.com/wvGKwPT8zg
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 26, 2025
NEW card just dropped in our Kommander Cosplay series! https://t.co/Ko4zKdX1O9 pic.twitter.com/qiAzxnPX0e
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 22, 2025
4. “Low Ratings Ingraham”
Moving over to Fox News, Newsom has a name for host Laura Ingraham. He calls her “Laura ‘Low Ratings’ Ingraham.” It’s simple and straight to the point. Just like Trump, he ties her name to falling ratings on TV. He even says she suffers from “Newsom Derangement Syndrome.”
LAURA “LOW RATINGS” INGRAHAM ON FOX HAS A TERRIBLE CASE OF NEWSOM DERANGEMENT SYNDROME (NDS!). THE AMERICAN PEOPLE LOVE ME, GAVIN C. NEWSOM, AMERICA’S FAVORITE GOVERNOR!!! FOX SHOULD CANCEL LAURA IMMEDIATELY — OR FACE HUGE “CONSEQUENCES!!!” THANK YOU! — GCN
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 29, 2025
5. “Little Man Johnson”
House Speaker Mike Johnson also gets a nickname. Newsom calls him “Mike ‘Little Man’ Johnson.” This one is easy to understand. It paints Johnson as small, weak, and unable to handle big responsibilities.
Mike “Little Man” Johnson can’t even answer a basic question: why is Louisiana’s homicide rate nearly 4X HIGHER than California’s?????
LOUISIANA IS A FAILED STATE! https://t.co/V3SmycxsaY
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 29, 2025
6. “Cancun Cruz”
Texas Senator Ted Cruz is next, and his name almost writes itself. Newsom calls him “Cancun Cruz.” This brings back the memory of when Cruz went on vacation during a crisis in Texas. Newsom doesn’t need to explain much. The name says it all.
CANCUN CRUZ lecturing others about running away?😂
Buddy, maybe sit this one out. https://t.co/3MoQzHPAyA pic.twitter.com/d5XmY0hKuU
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 21, 2025
7. “Ding Dong Perino”
Former White House Press Secretary Dana Perino also made the list. Her nickname is “Dana ‘Ding Dong’ Perino.” Newsom joked that he had “never even heard of her until today” and now she is “melting down” because of him. It’s silly, but that’s the point — to make her sound unserious.
DANA “DING DONG” PERINO (NEVER HEARD OF HER UNTIL TODAY!) IS MELTING DOWN BECAUSE OF ME, GAVIN C. NEWSOM! FOX HATES THAT I AM AMERICA’S MOST FAVORITE GOVERNOR (“RATINGS KING”) SAVING AMERICA — WHILE TRUMP CAN’T EVEN CONQUER THE “BIG” STAIRS ON AIR FORCE ONE ANYMORE!!! TRUMP HAS…
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 19, 2025
8. “Meatball Ron”
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is one of Trump’s main rivals, and Newsom didn’t even try to come up with something new. He simply borrowed Trump’s old favorite: “Meatball Ron.” Sometimes the classic nicknames still work best.
Florida let a murder suspect walk, California police had to step in and arrest him, and now Florida’s new LG is staging a photo op to pick him up.
Meatball Ron (who lost to Mickey Mouse) is now proving that California’s so-called ‘sanctuary’ laws actually work. Thanks, Governor!… https://t.co/m9vmPFhzQZ
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 21, 2025
9. “Garbage Man Greg”
Fox News host Greg Gutfeld didn’t escape either. For him, Newsom uses “Garbage Man Greg.” He says Gutfeld’s late-night show is trash and should be left out by the curb. Again, short and mean, just how Trump would do it.
I SELDOM WATCH LOW-RATED “GARBAGEMAN” GREG GUTFELD BUT, WHEN I DO, I MARVEL AT THE FAKE LAUGHTER ON THE SHOW. IT SOUNDS LIKE A BAD “LAUGH MACHINE,” IT’S SO OBNOXIOUS AND DISGUSTING, JUST LIKE HIM, ALWAYS LAUGHING NO MATTER WHAT IS SAID. REAL PATRIOTS HATE IT WHEN FOX (“EDITS THE…
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) August 20, 2025
10. “Grandpa” / “Dozy Don”
And finally, there is Trump himself. Newsom has been calling him “Grandpa” lately, and just in the past day, he tried out “Dozy Don.” Both names suggest that Trump is old, slow, and maybe even falling asleep at his own rallies.
night night grandpa! pic.twitter.com/BCw0UdSVVI
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) September 1, 2025
Stephen Miller let Dozy Don walk through the sprinklers after nap time so now he thinks he is an expert on water policy. pic.twitter.com/FDnt4uSXEd
— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) September 3, 2025
When you put them all together, you can see the pattern. Newsom is copying Trump’s style, but turning it back on Trump’s friends and allies. Every name is easy to remember, a little funny, and a little cruel. And the list is still growing.
Featured image via YouTube screengrab