In March, a Texas real estate agent who took part in the Capitol riot took to Twitter to say that her blonde hair and white skin would keep her out of jail. That’s not what happened with Jenna Ryan, though, as she was sentenced to 60 days behind bars for her role in the deadly January 6 Capitol attack. Well, now Jenna is explaining the bright side of going to prison, even though there is no bright side. In a video hilariously titled, “Keep positive – prison fit check,” Ryan says she will use her prison time to lose weight, detox from alcohol, and practice yoga.
Specifically, Ryan wants to lose 30 pounds in prison, which is rather telling because prison food is very starchy, and inmates usually leave heavier than when they were first incarcerated. Ryan also says, “Hopefully they have those protein shakes” in prison. She really has no concept of prison life.
Jenna Ryan, who flew to J6 in a private jet and vowed she would “never go to prison,” is turning herself in soon. She says if she can lose 30 pounds in jail it will be worth it, plans on doing yoga in jail, detoxing from alcohol, and “hopefully they have those protein shakes.” pic.twitter.com/tGNSqYNXtJ
— Ron Filipkowski (@RonFilipkowski) December 6, 2021
Twitter users piled in.
I hope she makes wise choices.. pic.twitter.com/BxAdzXHWsC
— The MinistryWasTruth✍may the alt-lie⚰ (@SeeleSays) December 6, 2021
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“I hope they have Himalayan pink salt and egg-white-only omelletes. And I don’t do soy, gluten, or nitrites. Some of the people I meet in prison are going to be in the market for a house when they’re released, so as a realtor I see this as a great networking opportunity.”
— Peter Fotopoulos Bane of Morons/Colonel of Truth (@PeterFotopoulos) December 6, 2021
She’s in for a real shock.
Omg thank you for this, Ron! Her TikTok is pure gold. pic.twitter.com/u4qQ05uKJC
— PatriotDaughter (@Cubfan13241) December 6, 2021
From the woman who brought you “I won’t go to prison because I’m white and blonde” comes “prison will be fun!”
— Dara (@daracohen) December 6, 2021
Can we please put a camera on her when she finds out jail isn’t a spa?
— Jesus Fucking Christ 🌈 (@SHEsus__Christ) December 6, 2021
The dumbest people.
— Rex Chapman🏇🏼 (@RexChapman) December 6, 2021
I wish her luck detoxing from alcohol in prison, but not with losing weight. She’s an idiot if she thinks they serve healthy foods in jail. And I don’t think she’ll be very popular there—just a hunch.
Featured image via Political Tribune gallery