In just a few short weeks, we’ll all be bearing witness to the presidential debates between Democratic nominee Joe Biden and current president/Republican nominee Donald Trump. The first debate between the two presidential candidates is set to take place on September 29th.
However, it seems as though Donald Trump wants to make damn sure that Joe Biden won’t have even the slightest one up on him before he takes to the stage with the guy who’s currently crushing him in the polls.
During an Oval Office interview this afternoon, Trump declared that he’d like to have drug tests administered to both himself and Biden ahead of their debate because evidently, he feels as though Biden has improved too much, too quickly.
“Nobody thought that he was even going to win,” Trump stated. “Because his debate performances were so bad. Frankly, his best performance was against Bernie. We’re going to call for a drug test, by the way, because his best performance was against Bernie. It wasn’t that he was Winston Churchill because he wasn’t, but it was a normal, boring debate. You know, nothing amazing happened. And we are going to call for a drug test because there’s no way — you can’t do that.”
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“What do you think was going on?” the interviewer pressed.
“I don’t know how he could have been so incompetent in his debate performances and then all of a sudden be OK against Bernie,” Donald responded. “My point is, if you go back and watch some of those numerous debates, he was so bad. He wasn’t even coherent. And against Bernie, he was. And we’re calling for a drug test.”
“Is this like a prizefight, where beforehand you have a test?” the interviewer asked.
“Well, it is a prizefighter,” Trump declared. “It’s no different from the gladiators, except we have to use our brain and our mouth. And our body to stand. I want all standing; they want to sit down.”
“All I can tell you is that I’m pretty good at this stuff,” he said. “I look. I watched him in the debates with all of the different people. He was close to incompetent, if not incompetent, and against Bernie, he was normal… and I say, ‘How does that happen?'” the president continued.
“Go back and watch his performances in some of those debates,” Trump added. “He didn’t know where he was. And all of a sudden, he was not good, he was normal, and I don’t understand how. I don’t know if there is or not, but somebody said to me he must be on drugs. I don’t know if that’s true or not, but I’m asking for a drug test. Both candidates. Me, too. I take an aspirin a day.”
Look, buddy, maybe you do take an Asprin a day. But we’ve all heard what Noel Casler, your former employee, has to say, mkay? And we’re not buying that.
Sourced from The Washington Examiner here.
Featured image via Flickr/Gage Skidmore, under Creative Commons license 2.0
