America’s most famous garden, a 60 year old landmark that hosted Kennedy press conferences, Nixon’s daughter’s wedding, and about a thousand historically significant moments, is now a patio with a bug infestation.
That detail became public after one of Trump’s closest allies spent an evening there and left genuinely horrified.
Dana White, UFC CEO, longtime Trump ally, and a man who has watched grown adults punch each other for a living, went to dinner at the newly reopened Rose Garden last week. He did not come away inspired. “The amount of gnats that were flying around,” White told the Boardroom podcast. “I’m like, ‘Holy s–t.'”
And according to White, the bugs were not just annoying. They were everywhere.
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To understand the gnats, you need to understand the garden. The grass area at the center of the Rose Garden, a Kennedy era design dating to 1962, was paved over entirely in July 2025. Trump’s stated reason was practical. Women complained their heels were sinking into the lawn, going “right through the grass, like four inches deep.” The result is a patio that bears a striking resemblance to one at his Mar-a-Lago resort in Palm Beach, complete, apparently, with the Florida wildlife.
Unfortunately, the wildlife showed up right before a major White House event.
Trump has tasked White with staging a showpiece UFC event at the White House to mark his 80th birthday on June 14, an occasion also honoring the 250th anniversary of America’s founding. Trump is expecting 5,000 spectators on the South Lawn. He called it potentially “the biggest event we’ve ever had at the White House.”
White quickly realized the insects might become part of the production.
“In your mouth, in your nose, while you’re trying to fight,” White warned, walking through the bug logistics with grim precision. “I was telling Craig, my head of production, I’m like, ‘Maybe we put fans in, because gnats have a bad time in the wind.'”
Which means the current White House plan apparently involves giant fans protecting UFC fighters from airborne patio insects during live pay per view television.
To be clear, the leading logistical threat to a presidential UFC event is insects. The solution being considered is fans. Very large fans, pointed at the president’s patio, to discourage gnats from entering fighters’ nostrils on live pay per view. “These are all the little details that we have to think about,” White said. “That’s why I don’t like fighting outside. Ever.”
And somehow, the bugs were still not the strangest part of the night.
The evening that inspired this logistical crisis also produced one of Trump’s more unusual dinner speeches. At a recent gathering there, Trump addressed guests and drifted into something resembling a self roast. “We call it the Rose Garden Club,” Trump told guests in the parking lot style setting. Then, reflecting on the broader state of the building, he announced that he had originally wanted to call it a “s–t house” but held back out of deference to Melania’s request that he act presidential.
Featured image via YouTube screengrab
